Real Talk

 I'm ready for some normalcy. I feel like I've been stuck in this house for years. I know I have done some traveling. I'm getting ready for my 4th trip out of the home in a couple of weeks. But it still feels like I have cabin fever. Maybe it's the uncertainty of things still. "I want to go to this place but are they open?" and "What are the new hours of this place?" or "Why are the store still out of stock of so many things?" I can't even get my kids some shorts because I can't find them. You can't try anything on so you have to make multiple trips back to the store to return things. Only to find they are now out of stock of all those items. I know, I know real world problems here. There are people dying all over the country. There are people out of jobs and yes Black lives do matter! 

There's a call for some normalcy and a call for some change. This is the most chaotic, abnormal, strange, anxious, depressing year ever. 

We leave in this new uncertainty. This is our new normal. All those feelings I just mentioned. That's how I felt this whole week. I swung my mood around so crazy my own head was spinning. 

Now that I'm coming back down to my own reality. I am realizing some things. 

You have to fight for the good not just for other people. For yourself, in yourself. It's literally a constant battle. We are taking a hard look at ourselves and we have to fight to change it. Change all the negative in your life. Even the negative you tell yourself when you're alone. You whisper it to yourself. You hear the words in your head. 

Stop comparing.

Stop criticizing.

You are not a failure.

Block and shut down the things that trigger you. Trigger those bad feelings. 

Confront the bad feelings in a relationship. 

Take everything one step at a time.
Be productive in the smallest things.

Be optimistic instead of pessimistic.

Feel the joy in everything around you.

Walk, run, sleep, watch a sunset/sunsrise

Plan a trip

Make something/ Be creative

Dance

Laugh.

Matthew 11:28 

Come to me all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest for your souls.

1 Peter 5:7

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Hebrews 4:11

Therefore let us be diligent to enter that rest so that no one will fall. 

...and well all else fails turn your dress into a duster/vest/jacket.

Have a great weekend all!

The thief of joy

Have you ever had a mid-life crisis? What actually constitutes a mid-life crisis. Am I too young for that at 33 years old? Maybe it's not an actual mid-life crisis, or even a crisis. Maybe it's a early life awakening. Yeah! I think that's what we will call it for argument sake. It could very well be the fact that we are starting a new decade now. I feel like major changes and decisions need to be made.

 In my previous post I mentioned a lot about self-care and taking the toxic poison out of my life. Negative thoughts, people, bad habits etc. Anything that can be a trigger in taking me down. I spent a couple decades falling into same patterns. 2020 was the perfect way for a fresh start. I'm getting too old for that stuff anyway. I recently found new podcasts that help a lot with that motivation and the constant self reflection. In an episode on Rachel Cruz's podcast she brought on a specialist that said when you have negative thoughts you actually are damaging your brain. I never even thought about that. Mind blown am I right? That was just the confirmation I needed to kick my butt into high gear. 

I'm 33 years old. Yes that's me closer to 40 then I was before. Have I learned much from my twenties or even in the last 3 years of my thirties. I feel like I have in some aspects of my life. In others not so much. Those sneaky little demons always creep up. So much I wrote a song about it that may very well be coming out soon so be on the lookout for that. 

I thought I would be at a different place in my life then I am, maybe just internally. I have to remind myself constantly of the things that I have accomplished. Where I am after the tumultuous roads I was taken down. I forget that that's inspiring to others. If it wasn't me I probably would be inspired. Why are we so self critical of ourselves? The grass isn't always greener on the other side. We are always wanting what someone else has because it makes us feel bad about what God has given us. I even heard about it in church this week. God's constantly saying "stay in your lane". God has something specific for your life. God has given you a set of gifts and tools and a purpose and only YOU can fulfill that. Comparison is the killer of dreams and the enemies biggest tool. Because he is a tool. HA! Just keeping it light. 

Bottom line here is I have to do the right things for my soul. If that means unfollowing people on social media if they trigger bad feelings for me. Detach myself from unhealthy relationships/friendships. Run after the positive things. Healing, my passions, bettering my marriage, my relationship with my kids, our home life. Focus on my creative outlets. At the end of the day I am a creative person. I know in my soul what I was put on this earth for. To what capacity I'm not sure. But you bet your great aunt sally that I will be chasing it. I know that God has given me these gifts (sometimes it feels like a curse i.e deep feelings, empathetic) for a reason. I will use them! 

On a side note: There's nothing wrong with having other passions and do them too. I'm working on that too because I'm a planner. I know the music industry is finicky so having my other passions on the back burner is a smart thing to do. 

I know this is the longest blog post I've written in awhile. It may have been only for my benefit. But I hope you can take something from this. Figure out your dreams and chase the heck out of it. It will feed your soul. Remember someone else's success does not take away from your own. 

In other news. Here's another winter outfit before spring comes. (I'm so behind)  

Style

Did you miss me?

I'm so glad I stocked up on all these cozy sweaters and jackets before I left Georgia. It's like 70 degree weather there and super cold here! But I still got to get these looks posted so we can start fresh. Look forward to a few more looks coming your way. Out with the old in with the new. That's the new mentality for 2020. Purging myself of everything toxic.. trying to at least. Let's see how long this new years resolutions last. We are pushing through in its only one month in.

How are you doing on your new year resolutions?

Fashion Friday {Oktoberfest}

I know its not exactly Halloween yet. But I was feeling the October vibes. All the Halloween movies are playing. Even the weird ones which I got a front row seat to at the nail salon this week. If you haven't seen the old cult classic "Trolls" definitely check that out. But watch it on mute like I did. The weirdest thing I have ever witnessed. 

I've been enjoying pumpkin spice vanilla chai teas, and king size candy bars in preparation for the season. I now just need to attack some decorating in the house with all these pumpkins and I'm good to go. Happy Friday everyone! 

Fashion Friday {Summer Siesta}

This has been a really nice week of unplugging! I took a nice little siesta with the family just enjoying summer a bit. The kids weren't fighting or whining. We may have proved the theory of screen time turning your kids into like crazy monsters. They played so nice together when we took them outside and gave them something to do. It was blissful! 

We did the beach, the water park, the movies, went out to eat. The hubby can't complain it was a great fathers day weekend. Now to plan the rest of summer vacation. We only have 6 weeks left before school starts. Already! I know it goes fast and it might be our last summer here. Then on the next place.

I need some more ideas. Let me know your favorite places to go and see. It can be anywhere from north carolina to the florida keys. Any place within driving distance that we can cross off our little bucket list. 

Now it's time to go back to unplugging for the weekend. Next week is going to be crazy!

I will be off to Texas!!

Fashion Friday {Festival Fashion}

 It's that time of year again. It's like that saying always a bridesmaid never a bride. That's kind of how I feel about Coachella! I love the fashion, the music but I never get to go. So I dress up from as if I am going and enjoy it from afar. Which I'm sure most of you guys are too! I'm not the only one right?

Maybe one day I will go. Hey maybe one day I will be performing there.  You never know.

In the mean time I might feel the urge for some festival fashion-esque outfits to post throughout the month. Happy Friday!

I'm going on a date now.

Fashion Friday {Let's get real}

Ok, I have to confess something to you. I'm not really a shopaholic. I can actually go months without looking online at a store. I can avoid certain aisles in stores. I can actually go into Target and come out with nothing. I'm not always looking for the great deal. Usually how it happens is I get bored of what I have in my closet. Not because I love spending money. Because putting outfits together is art for me. I know I've probably said it before but it's true. Fashion is a creative outlet to me. I love pairing patterns, textures, styles. So when I feel I need a refresher I will venture out. Like getting new brushes or paint for an artist. Or new pencils and paper for a writer. So I'm not going to be posting about sales going on. I might share the awesome deals I got. Because who doesn't love a good deal. Basically! I'm not your typical fashion blogger. I like to use what I got. I like to be frugal. I have a shopping rule now. I can only buy it if I can make 3 or more outfits out of that one item. It's served me well. You have probably seen these jeans a million times over in my posts. You've definitely seen these shoes. Because I am NOT a shoe addict! This bodysuit was clearance at Forever 21 and these lace kimono was maybe $10 at Ross! If that's your type of shopping then follow along with me. Let's be creative and frugal together! 

Happy Friday!