Conversations with an eight year old

{Brother annoying her}

Riley: He keeps yelling at me and I don't want to deal with it. 

{Starts clapping from across the room}

Mommy: Thank you Riley

Riley: I don't even know what we are clapping for.

Riley to Grandma: Mom said you had hot chocolate. Do you have marshmallows?

Grandma: No

Riley: Of course you don't.

{Sits on mommy}

Riley: You want a massage or something?

Mommy: I did just have a 2 hour massage.

{Starts chopping my back}

Mommy: Actually he didn't massage my head you can do that. 

{starts scratching my head}

Riley: You have sand in your hair.

Mommy: hahahahah that's dandruff

Mommy: What's daddy doing?

Riley: He's on the computer 

Mommy: What's he doing on there?

Riley: Either the bank or sports they both look the same.